What does it mean to Prosper?
"It is not God's will for us to have fame and fortune; it's His Will for us to Prosper."- Rev. Victor Borders Jr.
I wanted to start off this post with a quote from my husband because I wanted to talk about what real success is, and what real prosperity is. A while ago, I did a devotion called "How is your Soul?" by Judah Smith and it was based off his book that shares the same name. In his devotion he focuses on the scripture in 3 John 1:2 which says "Beloved, I wish above all things that thou mayest prosper, and be in health even as thy soul prospereth" What does this mean though? Well I like to delve in the Word deeper and the word prosper in this scripture comes from the greek word eudoo (yoo-od-o), and it means "to help on the road,succeed in reaching, to succeed in business affairs, to have a prosperous journey." Now that we have an idea of what prosper really means we can talk!
When I was doing this devotion I was actually in a very difficult place. My family was always sick and in the hospital, we were very broke, and we were even on the verge of eviction. It wasn't until I went on a 21 day fast and prayed for real breakthrough that I recently started seeing a change in our circumstances. At the time that I was fasting though after getting an understanding of where I was I realized that I wasn't prospering. In fact I was struggling, but I didn't just settle for my struggle. I honestly prayed and fasted and sought after God for some answers and he's been leading me. If you've been following my blog you see that little by little I've made progress. I have found that the more I humble myself the more I actually see progress.
A few days ago I was asking my friend Roxsand if she really loved Fashion, because she's been gawking about it ever since I've met her. When I asked her for the reason for her delay when it comes to stepping into her career she came up with 2 reasons. The first reason was that she wanted to go back to school, and the second reason was her daughter. I'm going to get to my view on that in just a minute but know that I told her that if she truly loves what she does then nothing and nobody can stop her from following her dreams. Most people I run into are like Roxsand, and even though I'm 26 I've heard this excuse several times from people in my family to friends and even strangers. People seem to look at school as some institution of infinite knowledge and a bright future, then they look at their kids as hindrances to their futures. The Bible actually says otherwise.
In Psalm 127:1 it says "Lo,children are an heritage of the Lord: and the fruit of the womb is his reward." Verse 2 even goes on to say they are like arrows in the hand of a mighty man. So how then is it that you can view your children as a burden when they are a heritage? According to the Hebrew dictionary that word comes from the word naḥalâ, and it means something inherited as an heirloom. Heirlooms are something you pass down for generations, and it comes with a responsibility to care for it greatly so that it can continue to be passed down. This is what children are- A heritage. That doesn't sound like a burden to me, it does sound like it's something that can get ruined if not properly taken care of though.
You are probably wondering what this has to do with anything...well let me break it down for you. In Proverbs 13:22 it says a good man leaves an inheritance for his children and his childrens children and that the wealth of the wicked is laid up for the just. In essence what I'm trying to say is if you're always making excuses not to follow your own life's purpose and give yourself a future, then of course you're going to sit around thinking that your kids are a burden and not a heritage from God. There is no doubt that kids are a great responsibility because to whom much is given much is required, or in the words of Uncle Ben from Spider man "With Great Power, comes great responsibility." So if you see your kids as a burden you basically don't value your inheritance as Esau did. I mean Jaccob did trick him out of his inheritance but if you read those verses carefully you see that Esau didn't see the value in it anyway and willfully gave it away for some stew. Obviously Jaccob valued the birthright more than his brother did, and even went as far as to trick him out of it and even repay him cheaply for it. I guess you don't know what you have until it's gone though.
When you settle for something that doesn't help you grow in your purpose, you are settling for stew. Let me clarify, you can take a 9-5 and still make investments in your future. I know several students who paid their way through college as a waitress because they had no other means of income. You don't have to stop chasing your dreams to settle for a job that doesn't make ends meet. You can build up to the point you desire. So making up an excuse to just take a job because you have to raise kids actually only brings temporary satisfaction to you and them. How can you leave an inheritance to your children and theirs if you are settling for stew yourself? You won't even have any to pass around. All you will have is a recipe for disaster that goes on for generations because they'll end up losing out in the long run, and having to work extra hard for themselves since there was nothing for them to inherit.
I actually do my work in front of my daughter, she sees when I create, and she asks me all the time to do the same. If I intend on her running my business in the future and giving it to her kids then I have to put in the work. This brings me to my next point. Solomon said there is a time to sow and a time to reap, and both of those things require work. You have to invest in yourself, to invest in your children. You have to put in for a brighter future for yourself or you won't have anything of value to pass down to them. When it's time to reap you have to put in just as much time and effort as you did when you invested in yourself. You can't let your harvest go bad or get eaten by pests. Yes there is a blessing in the harvest but because people don't like to sow into their futures or do it sparingly they reap sparingly. It's no wonder why the laborers are few, they're looking for God to give them this BIG blessing just to end up with something so little, then they wonder why? Well if you don't invest very much into it, then there's a very slim chance of you having a HUGE return on investment. You'll just get older expecting someone to take care of you. If you had kids then you probably would expect them to do it because of all you've done for them. I mean, wasn't it Solomon who also said All is vanity when men labor but can't eat the fruit thereof? How vain would it be if you continue down this path of making no progress towards a brighter future, just so you can live minimally, and give that life to your kids? You can't expect them to take care of you on minimum wage right? You can barely care for them on that!
Now going back to the story of Roxsand. That night I actually taught her how to design a croqui which are fashion figures or illustrations to represent your designs. She had already had experience doing fashion croquis before, but only with a template. This time I taught her how to make her own. I wanted to show her this for several reasons. The first and most primary reason was that she was my friend, second I wanted her to understand that everything you learn isn't always in a college or a school, and the final thing I wanted her to know is that it's never too late and there's never a reason you shouldn't follow your dreams.
No one knows how self taught I really am, I mean yes I am college educated but I was very self taught before I stepped foot into a school. All of my experience making jewelry, refurbishing clothes, and doing any art work came way before I saw a college. By the time that I stepped into school I already had 8-10 years of experience under my belt. Why wait until you go to school to start a career or make moves towards one? There were people I went to school with who were in their 30's and they said they'd been sewing since they were 3 years old.
In light of the information era, you don't necessarily have to go to school to attain information. In fact, some college professors post YouTube video's so their online students can have a visual experience. Some things aren't even taught in school because it can't be afforded. This was my experience at Bauder College. I was blessed enough to have a 1 on 1 session with my professor Mrs. Mori Green. She was FIT (Fashion Institute of Technology) alumni, had a masters in Fashion Illustration, had been sewing since childhood, and even had her own design line at one point. Anyway, this lady taught me in one sitting both Human Anatomy, and Fashion Illustration. Human Anatomy was not a class offered at Bauder, and Mrs. Green had fought tooth and nail for us to get it with no success. It was considered "too expensive" (but they added a new nursing major and division in the school-Don't get me started!). I don't know why people think college has all the information they'll ever need? Even if it did have infinite information, knowledge is worthless unless it's applied.
All this to say that prosperity truly is a journey and if you have family (your kids) they'll be fortunate enough to take this journey with you and give you help on the road. The road is not always easy, but it is an adventure. We can't be picky about how we reach our destiny all the time if we desire to prosper. Sometimes you may end up taking one route and then another, but the whole idea is to take the journey. There is more than one way to get to your destination, just stay steadfast and you will be able to get there. Don't get discouraged if you have to take an alternate route. Believe it or not Bauder College was my 3rd alternate route. My initial school of choice was FIT in NY because that's where I am from. Then I changed to wanting to go to SCAD until I realized how expensive it was, and then I just went with Bauder because I realized my dreams and purpose was still the same. Going to Bauder was doable because it wasn't expensive like SCAD and it was in my reach by bus. Within a matter of 2 years I had my Associate Degree. I got the thing done because I stopped being picky, and I still accomplished my goal because they were S.M.A.R.T. (Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Realistic, and Timely) You can't shoot for the stars without a rocket-ship or some tool to help you, because it's unreal right? So make SMART goals. Write them down...do a vision board if you have to or just put it on a piece of paper and tape it to the wall to stay motivated. Whatever you do DON'T GIVE UP.
The desire for me and my daughter to talk about how far we've come and how much progress we've made is driving me to do something more than just satisfy her by providing temporarily. I want to give her something meaningful. I want to pass down my wisdom as well as a good inheritance. I know she's a great responsibility-she's a small child. I'm raising another human with different thoughts and emotions, and because I have to train her in the WAY she should go, I take raising her seriously. Considering my daughter a burden is spitting on the heritage God has given me, and cursing the future-both mine, hers and others to come. I don't want to be like Esau, and not consider the value of my future. I want every generation after me to prosper, but it starts with me making a decision for myself.
I know I've been sitting here talking about my daughter a lot, and it's only because I understand that she is my heir. My other kids may take an interest but it has been prophesied to me over and over that my daughter has my mantel, and she proves it every time she asks me to create something. When she was baby dedicated it was prophesied over her life that she would be creative with her hands. She was only 6 months old, but I only took that as a confirmation of what I'd already knew in my spirit-that my daughter would take on the business, and make it even greater. All I do is create with my hands, and all I could envision myself doing was teaching her just that. Therefore she is a heritage from God, and I must take care of her. I will want a break sometimes from doing so much but I will never stop being a mom.
I will never stop being me, and that means who I am totally. I can't teach my kids to be themselves if I'm not comfortable accepting who I am. I'm more than a mom, I'm also a wife, I'm an entrepreneur, a minister, a friend, a sister... I don't have to stop being one thing to be another. Chaka Khan said "I am every woman, it's all in me" maybe that's sort of what she meant?
If you are feeling any of the ways I described in this post, I don't want you to think I'm dogging, and criticizing you. I just want you to ask God to renew your mind, because the way you are thinking is toxic. Mindsets can empower you or cripple you for life, and it's a choice to take either path. I want to ensure that I encourage you about the direction you are going. It's never too late to begin or complete what you've started. I hope that reading my perspective enlightens you.
As for my friend Roxsand I pray multiple blessings over her life. I hope that our little encounter last night helped her understand that when it comes to the purpose in your life that there should never be a delay in growth. I hope that she begins to PROSPER in its true definition, by making progress, first by building her resume with Fashion Experience, and then gradually working her way up the ladder. Who knows? Maybe God will see fit to provide for her to go back to school like she desires, but she has to show that she is serious about it and grow in confidence concerning her career. I wish I could hire her, because I would totally teach her the ropes, but until I get myself established I'll just give her pointers. I just really hope she's prepared for whatever she takes on in life, and there are some things that high school and college won't teach you.
I've been speaking this message to many. It's a lesson I've learned over and over. I watched my mother as a child, and then when I had my children I had a different perspective. I know the struggles of having nothing to inherit, and so I make it my business to provide a future for my children. I think so different now that I'm older, and I can speak on certain things because of my experience. Nothing hurts me more than a dream deferred. It really does make the heart sick. The scripture in 3 John 1:2 talked about being in good health. If your heart is always sick from putting off your dreams, how can you prosper? So Peace and Blessings to you on your journey from a fellow Family Career Woman.
I wanted to start off this post with a quote from my husband because I wanted to talk about what real success is, and what real prosperity is. A while ago, I did a devotion called "How is your Soul?" by Judah Smith and it was based off his book that shares the same name. In his devotion he focuses on the scripture in 3 John 1:2 which says "Beloved, I wish above all things that thou mayest prosper, and be in health even as thy soul prospereth" What does this mean though? Well I like to delve in the Word deeper and the word prosper in this scripture comes from the greek word eudoo (yoo-od-o), and it means "to help on the road,succeed in reaching, to succeed in business affairs, to have a prosperous journey." Now that we have an idea of what prosper really means we can talk!
When I was doing this devotion I was actually in a very difficult place. My family was always sick and in the hospital, we were very broke, and we were even on the verge of eviction. It wasn't until I went on a 21 day fast and prayed for real breakthrough that I recently started seeing a change in our circumstances. At the time that I was fasting though after getting an understanding of where I was I realized that I wasn't prospering. In fact I was struggling, but I didn't just settle for my struggle. I honestly prayed and fasted and sought after God for some answers and he's been leading me. If you've been following my blog you see that little by little I've made progress. I have found that the more I humble myself the more I actually see progress.
A few days ago I was asking my friend Roxsand if she really loved Fashion, because she's been gawking about it ever since I've met her. When I asked her for the reason for her delay when it comes to stepping into her career she came up with 2 reasons. The first reason was that she wanted to go back to school, and the second reason was her daughter. I'm going to get to my view on that in just a minute but know that I told her that if she truly loves what she does then nothing and nobody can stop her from following her dreams. Most people I run into are like Roxsand, and even though I'm 26 I've heard this excuse several times from people in my family to friends and even strangers. People seem to look at school as some institution of infinite knowledge and a bright future, then they look at their kids as hindrances to their futures. The Bible actually says otherwise.
In Psalm 127:1 it says "Lo,children are an heritage of the Lord: and the fruit of the womb is his reward." Verse 2 even goes on to say they are like arrows in the hand of a mighty man. So how then is it that you can view your children as a burden when they are a heritage? According to the Hebrew dictionary that word comes from the word naḥalâ, and it means something inherited as an heirloom. Heirlooms are something you pass down for generations, and it comes with a responsibility to care for it greatly so that it can continue to be passed down. This is what children are- A heritage. That doesn't sound like a burden to me, it does sound like it's something that can get ruined if not properly taken care of though.
You are probably wondering what this has to do with anything...well let me break it down for you. In Proverbs 13:22 it says a good man leaves an inheritance for his children and his childrens children and that the wealth of the wicked is laid up for the just. In essence what I'm trying to say is if you're always making excuses not to follow your own life's purpose and give yourself a future, then of course you're going to sit around thinking that your kids are a burden and not a heritage from God. There is no doubt that kids are a great responsibility because to whom much is given much is required, or in the words of Uncle Ben from Spider man "With Great Power, comes great responsibility." So if you see your kids as a burden you basically don't value your inheritance as Esau did. I mean Jaccob did trick him out of his inheritance but if you read those verses carefully you see that Esau didn't see the value in it anyway and willfully gave it away for some stew. Obviously Jaccob valued the birthright more than his brother did, and even went as far as to trick him out of it and even repay him cheaply for it. I guess you don't know what you have until it's gone though.
When you settle for something that doesn't help you grow in your purpose, you are settling for stew. Let me clarify, you can take a 9-5 and still make investments in your future. I know several students who paid their way through college as a waitress because they had no other means of income. You don't have to stop chasing your dreams to settle for a job that doesn't make ends meet. You can build up to the point you desire. So making up an excuse to just take a job because you have to raise kids actually only brings temporary satisfaction to you and them. How can you leave an inheritance to your children and theirs if you are settling for stew yourself? You won't even have any to pass around. All you will have is a recipe for disaster that goes on for generations because they'll end up losing out in the long run, and having to work extra hard for themselves since there was nothing for them to inherit.
I actually do my work in front of my daughter, she sees when I create, and she asks me all the time to do the same. If I intend on her running my business in the future and giving it to her kids then I have to put in the work. This brings me to my next point. Solomon said there is a time to sow and a time to reap, and both of those things require work. You have to invest in yourself, to invest in your children. You have to put in for a brighter future for yourself or you won't have anything of value to pass down to them. When it's time to reap you have to put in just as much time and effort as you did when you invested in yourself. You can't let your harvest go bad or get eaten by pests. Yes there is a blessing in the harvest but because people don't like to sow into their futures or do it sparingly they reap sparingly. It's no wonder why the laborers are few, they're looking for God to give them this BIG blessing just to end up with something so little, then they wonder why? Well if you don't invest very much into it, then there's a very slim chance of you having a HUGE return on investment. You'll just get older expecting someone to take care of you. If you had kids then you probably would expect them to do it because of all you've done for them. I mean, wasn't it Solomon who also said All is vanity when men labor but can't eat the fruit thereof? How vain would it be if you continue down this path of making no progress towards a brighter future, just so you can live minimally, and give that life to your kids? You can't expect them to take care of you on minimum wage right? You can barely care for them on that!
Now going back to the story of Roxsand. That night I actually taught her how to design a croqui which are fashion figures or illustrations to represent your designs. She had already had experience doing fashion croquis before, but only with a template. This time I taught her how to make her own. I wanted to show her this for several reasons. The first and most primary reason was that she was my friend, second I wanted her to understand that everything you learn isn't always in a college or a school, and the final thing I wanted her to know is that it's never too late and there's never a reason you shouldn't follow your dreams.
This is one of Roxsands croqui's she did using a template...she's really good and has lot of vision and potential.
Here is the picture of the one I taught her to make without a template. I know it looks like a robot and there is no design put on it, but this is a start for someone who didn't know how to draw their own croqui.
No one knows how self taught I really am, I mean yes I am college educated but I was very self taught before I stepped foot into a school. All of my experience making jewelry, refurbishing clothes, and doing any art work came way before I saw a college. By the time that I stepped into school I already had 8-10 years of experience under my belt. Why wait until you go to school to start a career or make moves towards one? There were people I went to school with who were in their 30's and they said they'd been sewing since they were 3 years old.
In light of the information era, you don't necessarily have to go to school to attain information. In fact, some college professors post YouTube video's so their online students can have a visual experience. Some things aren't even taught in school because it can't be afforded. This was my experience at Bauder College. I was blessed enough to have a 1 on 1 session with my professor Mrs. Mori Green. She was FIT (Fashion Institute of Technology) alumni, had a masters in Fashion Illustration, had been sewing since childhood, and even had her own design line at one point. Anyway, this lady taught me in one sitting both Human Anatomy, and Fashion Illustration. Human Anatomy was not a class offered at Bauder, and Mrs. Green had fought tooth and nail for us to get it with no success. It was considered "too expensive" (but they added a new nursing major and division in the school-Don't get me started!). I don't know why people think college has all the information they'll ever need? Even if it did have infinite information, knowledge is worthless unless it's applied.
All this to say that prosperity truly is a journey and if you have family (your kids) they'll be fortunate enough to take this journey with you and give you help on the road. The road is not always easy, but it is an adventure. We can't be picky about how we reach our destiny all the time if we desire to prosper. Sometimes you may end up taking one route and then another, but the whole idea is to take the journey. There is more than one way to get to your destination, just stay steadfast and you will be able to get there. Don't get discouraged if you have to take an alternate route. Believe it or not Bauder College was my 3rd alternate route. My initial school of choice was FIT in NY because that's where I am from. Then I changed to wanting to go to SCAD until I realized how expensive it was, and then I just went with Bauder because I realized my dreams and purpose was still the same. Going to Bauder was doable because it wasn't expensive like SCAD and it was in my reach by bus. Within a matter of 2 years I had my Associate Degree. I got the thing done because I stopped being picky, and I still accomplished my goal because they were S.M.A.R.T. (Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Realistic, and Timely) You can't shoot for the stars without a rocket-ship or some tool to help you, because it's unreal right? So make SMART goals. Write them down...do a vision board if you have to or just put it on a piece of paper and tape it to the wall to stay motivated. Whatever you do DON'T GIVE UP.
The desire for me and my daughter to talk about how far we've come and how much progress we've made is driving me to do something more than just satisfy her by providing temporarily. I want to give her something meaningful. I want to pass down my wisdom as well as a good inheritance. I know she's a great responsibility-she's a small child. I'm raising another human with different thoughts and emotions, and because I have to train her in the WAY she should go, I take raising her seriously. Considering my daughter a burden is spitting on the heritage God has given me, and cursing the future-both mine, hers and others to come. I don't want to be like Esau, and not consider the value of my future. I want every generation after me to prosper, but it starts with me making a decision for myself.
I know I've been sitting here talking about my daughter a lot, and it's only because I understand that she is my heir. My other kids may take an interest but it has been prophesied to me over and over that my daughter has my mantel, and she proves it every time she asks me to create something. When she was baby dedicated it was prophesied over her life that she would be creative with her hands. She was only 6 months old, but I only took that as a confirmation of what I'd already knew in my spirit-that my daughter would take on the business, and make it even greater. All I do is create with my hands, and all I could envision myself doing was teaching her just that. Therefore she is a heritage from God, and I must take care of her. I will want a break sometimes from doing so much but I will never stop being a mom.
I will never stop being me, and that means who I am totally. I can't teach my kids to be themselves if I'm not comfortable accepting who I am. I'm more than a mom, I'm also a wife, I'm an entrepreneur, a minister, a friend, a sister... I don't have to stop being one thing to be another. Chaka Khan said "I am every woman, it's all in me" maybe that's sort of what she meant?
If you are feeling any of the ways I described in this post, I don't want you to think I'm dogging, and criticizing you. I just want you to ask God to renew your mind, because the way you are thinking is toxic. Mindsets can empower you or cripple you for life, and it's a choice to take either path. I want to ensure that I encourage you about the direction you are going. It's never too late to begin or complete what you've started. I hope that reading my perspective enlightens you.
As for my friend Roxsand I pray multiple blessings over her life. I hope that our little encounter last night helped her understand that when it comes to the purpose in your life that there should never be a delay in growth. I hope that she begins to PROSPER in its true definition, by making progress, first by building her resume with Fashion Experience, and then gradually working her way up the ladder. Who knows? Maybe God will see fit to provide for her to go back to school like she desires, but she has to show that she is serious about it and grow in confidence concerning her career. I wish I could hire her, because I would totally teach her the ropes, but until I get myself established I'll just give her pointers. I just really hope she's prepared for whatever she takes on in life, and there are some things that high school and college won't teach you.
I've been speaking this message to many. It's a lesson I've learned over and over. I watched my mother as a child, and then when I had my children I had a different perspective. I know the struggles of having nothing to inherit, and so I make it my business to provide a future for my children. I think so different now that I'm older, and I can speak on certain things because of my experience. Nothing hurts me more than a dream deferred. It really does make the heart sick. The scripture in 3 John 1:2 talked about being in good health. If your heart is always sick from putting off your dreams, how can you prosper? So Peace and Blessings to you on your journey from a fellow Family Career Woman.
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